What To Do For A Friend Who Lost A Baby

If the child was an infant ask if the baby was named so that you can refer to him or her by name.

Continue your support over the long haul. Encourage your friend or family member to call you or reach out when they experience these feelings. So don t ask just do. As time goes by let your friend know you haven t forgotten their child.

Before my father passed away i did all the things you are supposed to do when a friend loses a parent. Receiving a sympathy gift that specifically honors the miscarriage or infant loss provides enfolding comfort to grieving parents. Knowing that someone cared enough to honor their grief with a gift validates this tragic loss and provides comfort in a time when comfort is difficult to find. Your bereaved friend or family member may need your support for months or even years.

Do not say anything that tries to fix the unfixable and you will do just fine. A great way to help your friend in this time is to make a home cooked meal or pick up her favorite meal and deliver it to her. Encourage the family to plan memorial. Your friend s loss cannot be fixed or repaired or solved.

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Acknowledge the child s life and refer to him or her by name. Stay in touch with the grieving person periodically checking in dropping by or sending letters or cards. Light a candle for them bring their name up in conversation now and then or make a donation in their name. When a person who has lived a full life passes away there is a sense that everything is as it should be.

It is an unfathomable relief to have a friend who does not try to take the pain away. 3 do not try to fix the unfixable. This is a common gesture depending on your culture that can produce feelings of being supported which is important in helping individuals cope with grief. The friend i didn t know how to be until i lost my dad in october 2012.

Send a card send flowers say a prayer. However when a baby dies there is a sadness that goes beyond normal grief. If they don t want to talk about it don t pressure them. Emotional reactions may include panic persistent fears nervousness and nightmares.

One friend who lost her baby a few. Planning a wake funeral and burial even if cremated can be helpful. Help your friend remember their child. And with each phone call i try to be like the friends i had when i lost my dad in october 2012.

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Send a sympathy gift. Bring food regularly send messages telling them that you re thinking of them write letters sharing your memories of their child. The pain itself cannot be made better. We are programmed to expect that the old outlive the young.

Don t worry that you might be bringing back painful memories for your friend.